Why 'Recession' is better than 'Depression'

Names are words. (Duh!) For a name to be impactful, the word representing it must make all the right noises, if you know what I mean. And if you don't, here's what: In the thirties, after the Great Depression of '29, people didn't want to hear the sound of the 'D' word, preferably, ever again. So, they came up with a new, kinder, more compassionate sounding one: Recession. Any economic downturn in the years that followed the big 'D' came to be termed as a 'Recession'. Essentially, recession became a euphemism for depression.

That said, the Great Depression is not the only reason people prefer recession, the sound of it, also, helps soften the blow. Or at least it did, back then. Now, though, we're in a time where some of us could do with a euphemism for the big 'R'. Whatever softer sounding word we go for, it'll help to arrive at the appropriate one once we have understood why people prefer the sound of 'recession' to 'depression'. Here's a thumb rule to acquaint yourself with and apply on all words/terms in the 'bad news' space.

The explanation, in short: Recession has two 'hard sounds' less than 'Depression'. Think about how useful this kind of 'tongue-walking-on-eggshells' becomes, literally and metaphorically, when you're looking for the right words (or word) to break the bad news. Recession, from the linguistic, oral and word navigation points-of-view, was easier to handle than 'depression'. (Just say it, softly.)

Next thing you know, we'll have a euphemism for 'recession'? (Don't we, already?) Whatever the people who decide these things proclaim it should be, we think for it to work, it'll have to drop the 'sion'. Any ideas on what the next recession will be called? Anyone for 'Hiccup'? It has no soft sounds but sounds less sombre than 'recession'. Sadly, a hiccup is too short to be seriously considered as a contender for the title of 'euphemism for recession'.

How about 'slowdown'? Ok.

Why your baby needs us

Because when you leave it to the machines or people who think like machines (read: big name branding companies), this is what you are likely to end up with. That's why, to quote Unantha, "If you want a name for your company, brand, kitten or illegitimate child, do write to namasutra@gmail.com". Or else, you might just end up being shilled a bunch of names like Pistoer, Dlvil, Nlcleynde, Stenglad, Venj, Phaviker, Abeaerber, Lamorth or Zerkk for your baby. All nicely packaged in a powerpoint presentations. Of course.

Brands named after places

Kingston, Chowpatty, Champagne, Scotch (Okay, maybe I'm stretching things a bit here), Incredible India, Made in USA ... and more such places that are also brands. Different kinds of marketing strategies, intentional and otherwise, have contributed to turning the above places into brands. Where I spend a part of my working week, there's an Indian fast food joint called 'Chowpatty @ BTM'. Clearly, it's riding on the brand values people have come to associate with 'Chowpatty'. But what if 'C in Mumbai' goes to the dogs? Will that hurt 'C @ BTM'? Fortunately, there are more important things to think about.

By the bye, this might the first post on 'brands named after places' on the Internet. In other words, if you are 'wiki' enough to add to this list, you'll be part of hisotry in the making.

'Wiki enough': Term which means 'to be magnanimous enough, big hearted, contributing enough ... towards a social cause.' (Like 'Nama Sutra'.)

A baby named CISCO?

What's that song by Kishore Kumar about going to Japan and ending up in China ... I'm so bad at remembering songs ... or for that matter anything. I wonder why ... hmmm. Neways, so brought it up 'cause I was going Googling for 'eponymous brand names' and coming up with zilch when I chanced upon this little gem of an entry about babies named after brands. "It's hilarious. And sad. I'll save you the commentary. Little wonder she looks pissed. Enjoy.

Mustache Warthog Palin

Is what Sarah Palin might have named yours truly if she were unfortunate enough to be my mom. To find out what you might have been christened under her barracuda gaze check out the 'Sarah Palin Baby Name Generator'.

10 nice excuses for killing a nice brand name

Hey Mr. Name Nemesis, the next time you want the sadistic pleasure of burying a nice name, don't forget to use one of these excuses...

1. I dunno how they will pronounce it in Sub-Saharan Africa.
2. I liked that name. But 10 out of 9 people I asked, didn't seem to share my opinion.
3. Research says it's one syllable too long.
4. I get this feeling I've heard this name before. Anyway, we'll ask the lawyers to do a double check. Meanwhile, gimme one more option.
5. It'll make a good name for a condom. But our category is a little more corporate.
6. I agree it's a decent name. But it's a little too serious for our category. Can we have some more fun?
7. Oops, I should have told you. The name is not numerologically compliant with my wife's lucky number.
8. I hear it means 'Horse's Piss' in Esperanto slang.
9. Will the man on the street in Jhumritalaya be able to understand what it means?
10. I like the first half of the name, can we do something with the second?